But why, Matt? Why!?
Many people have asked me “why?”. Why am I going far, far away from my family, my friends, my employment with a small pharmaceutical company, and the wonderful city of Indianapolis? Good question – one I’ve been pondering for over a year now.
Simply (and somewhat vaguely) put, I am seeking out what makes me come alive. Let me explain a little. Way back in high school I had a Spanish teacher who made it her mission to expose southeastern Indiana kids to other cultures so as to realize 1) we are not alone in the world, 2) there are other ways to do life, 3) culture and difference can be beautiful, wonderful, fun, and tasty things. (She also taught us lots of Spanish grammar, but that’s not germane to this current discussion. Drop me an email to request the wild tales of Spanish grammar from B-ville high.)
The lessons of Señora Seright were embedded in my psyche after having the opportunity to study in Spain during the summer of 1996. It was there that I fell in love with the Spanish culture, people, and language learning. I added to this initial experience by spending a college semester in Spain in 1999. After this spring semester, I rode the rails with a couple friends throughout Western Europe for two weeks and thoroughly enjoyed the challenge of determining how to have the most fun in each country without offending the locals. By the end of the trip we were tired and a little dirty, but we had memories that will last a lifetime.
Seeking the perfect marriage of purpose and travel, I went with a group of eighteen from Taylor University to Honduras in the spring of 2001. There we built houses and spent time with Hondurans. It was here that I was extremely blessed to be able to utilize my Spanish to help others communicate. I was absolutely amazed at how fast my rusty Spanish came back to me, even esoteric words. In one case, a woman was explaining to me that her husband, an albañil, needed a job. I thought back to my 1996 studies in Spain when I learned this word while walking around a serendipitous pile of bricks on our way to lunch. Not until 2001 did I actually use the word. Out of that conversation I was able to tell the construction foreman of another skilled worker who could help construct houses. It was here in Honduras that I first understood that God had been preparing me for service.
Fast forward through a few other cross-cultural experiences, marinated throughout by amazing relationships with friends from literally all over the world, and you’ll get to my last couple years at Taylor. During these last two years I spent much time with friends that grew up as MKs/TCKs (Missionary Kids/Third Culture Kids) and missionaries. I was involved with TU’s World Opportunities Week (WOW) for two years, co-directing the year that George Verwer spoke. These interactions helped to grow a deep desire to serve Jesus in an international context.
As I left college only a few tasks remained from the to do list I mentally created years before. Seeing that the ever-elusive goal of marriage remained, well, elusive, I was left with the goal to become gainfully employed and begin a life of happiness. Simple enough, right? Through an amazing turn of events (and some amazing people – Tara, & Steve) I began working for a small pharmaceutical company in Indianapolis who continues to employ me to this day. I have been extremely blessed to work with such talented, capable, hardworking, personable folks. I could not have asked for a better team of people on which to work. The work is very meaningful and important, but after working for several months I realized it was not my passion.
At that time, however, I did not even know what my passions were. Sad – but it was an opportunity to learn patience. My prayer became, “Lord, show me my passions.” I learned much over the following two years (my first two in Indy). Through friends at church, I learned more about the Kingdom of God – how it is here and now (Mark 1:15) and that I am a part of fostering it here and inviting others to join in the freedom that it offers. I learned more about God’s heart for the poor, though I still consider myself ignorant in this area. Out of Matthew 25:31-46 I learned that Jesus is among the poor. He is there for me to feed, give something to drink, to invite in, and clothe. I learned by doing that when I allow myself to go to places outside of my comfort zone that the reward is great. Going to such places can be a type of what the Celts called “thin places.” It is in such places where the eternal and the temporary meet, and a person is given an opportunity to see more clearly that which is good. A person can hear from God easier in a thin place because he has left behind all the things that get in the way of doing so.
During this time I developed friendships with several people who helped me realize my excitement for international service. Several of my friends are learning lessons about God, themselves, and life throughout the world. I am humbled just to be able to call such people “friends.” As I told their stories to friends and family, my blood pressure would rise and my audience would see my pearly whites. As I recounted the tales of my friends I would come more alive. I had found passion.
A Predicament. The dangerous part of praying anything to a listening God is that He just might answer. My prayer for passion had been given an answer, at least for this moment in life. But I had to follow this up with action, or risk being that sad individual who knows what he’d like to do, but is too afraid to follow after it. I call this situation the bondage of security. I have great friends and family nearby, a job with great coworkers, a house, a car, and no risk in sight. Strangely, therein lies the problem when the passion that tugs at your heart pulls you away from these blessings. It is a bondage to the feeling of security when the threat of life alive beckons.
So enter Word Made Flesh (WMF). Many of my friends have gone on Servant Team experiences and/or been on staff with WMF. All of them saw, experienced, and learned about the very things that I desire to do – poverty, injustice, community, simplicity, service, brokenness, suffering, intimacy. I expect to learn much and be changed forever, but don’t expect to come back an expert by any means. I desire to better understand God’s heart for the poor by living among and serving them. I desire to serve and see Jesus among the poor. I desire to reduce my ignorance of God’s love and the world’s problems. Most of all, I desire to become more of the person that God has designed me to be, and, in doing so, live life fully alive.
So there it is … a bit of the why. There was no outline; I apologize for the randomness of it all. My high school English teacher would cry a single tear for such poor organization (sorry Grims). If you have questions, please email me or reply to the post.